Thursday, May 24, 2012

Child care

I have 2 littlest boys, 1 who loves day care, and 1 who hates it with a passion.

He only went a couple of times, the last time (2 weeks ago) was so traumatic that every time I pull up to drop Ashton off, Elijah cries that he doesn't want to get out or he'll cling to me the whole time. His new thing is, when I pull up he declares "Lijah stay, mummy be minute" ...

Tomorrow, I've booked him in. I've booked them both in.

I need a break. I need some me time. It's been so so so long since I've had the day to myself.

The couple of times when Elijah was in on a Friday, Ashton and I did playgroup.

Tomorrow it's all about me, and instead of feeling happy I feel sick with worry.

I know it will get easier. I wish I could flick the switch off that makes me feel like this. I'm dreading it.

I know he will scream, kick, cry hysterically, and be totally and utterly devastated.
I know he'll feel betrayed and angry.
I know I'll pay for it with a clingy child for the few days following.
I know he'll get really upset again when we drop Ashton off for those 3 days a week.

But I hope that one day, sooner rather than later, he'll understand why mummy just needs 1 day to hang up the mummy hat and unwind.

Sometimes you have to be selfish.
Sometimes it just has to be all about you.

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